Swan Song

A heartbreak poem

Breaking up with a loved one is a painful tragedy. And yet, how many great stories (and heartbreak poems…) are born from tragedies. When heartbreak is on, it can feel devastating. And there’s no sugarcoating, this is so hard to be with.

But it need not be the end of the story. My story, that is, for a breakup throws me back unto myself and who I am and want to be. Having had my share of breakups, one of the things I learned  to see is that good that those relationships have brought into my life. I wouldn’t be who I am without them. Pain is not the end of my path.

And in this way, this breakup poem is, really, a love poem about a greater love.

Chapters:

• 00:00:00 Intro
• 00:00:26 Swan Song – Solo
• 00:03:02 The tough teaching of a breakup
• 00:11:26 Swan Song – Remix
• 00:14:50 Outro

Transcript

Swan Song

That we
We once were
As old as the stars
As deep as the sea
As solid as a mountain
As wild as a rapid
Is gone
No more

How could a love so strong
Become a love gone wrong
How could all that forever
Turn into never

From those high mountain peaks
Sprang that tiniest of creeks
Swell to a brook
Over rock and rapids took
My how it gushed
Till it finally hushed
Spent itself to a lake
Took a break
Came to halt

The death of the brook
Was the birth of the lake
And from there a river flows
Down to the ocean

Is a love in vain ’cause it is no more?

If there had been no brook
There had been no lake
If there had been no lake
There had been no river

The ocean is wide
Swallows tears, pain and pride

©️ Laughing Brook/Peter Müller 2024

The tough teaching of a breakup

Love. My, my – love. Ohhh, love! How it takes me on a ride, how it sends me on a spin. How it is the very thing that makes the world go round. How it gets to me, time and time again. How I hunger for it, how I chase it. How it is the fuel for so many of my hopes and dreams and fears. And not only me, it is in songs and stories, from ancient myth to the latest bestsellers and movies. How it makes life juicy and colourful. Ah, the things we do for love. 

And how sweet when I find it. What a blessing it is, better than gold. The sweetness of another, the loving touch, the loving gaze. The intimate conversations, the rest and peace we find with each other. The balance it gives me in life, not having to make it alone because there is my beloved. The fire of passion shared. A solid boat with which I sail the stormy seas of life. Breakfast together. A cuddle in the night. Watching a movie snugged up on the sofa. Kissing. Holding hands on a walk. The glory of watching a sunset together.

And how hard it is when it ends. Skies, darker than dreadful thunderstorms. The ground ripped from underneath me. My heart riddled with daggers. The tears, the darkness, the emptiness, the hopelessness, the doubt, oh, life just lost it’s sweetness. The anger, the pain, the void that wants to suck me into it’s maelstrom of desperation and destruction. Will I ever love again? Will I ever want to love again? What for? Why? What’s the point of it all? 

A former lover of mine once said so very wisely: In the end, you will always be alone. What she meant: There are always experiences I will face alone, no matter how strong and fantastic a love I am having. My innermost thoughts and feelings are mine, and only mine. The way I experience life will always ever be only mine, and mine alone. No matter how great and lasting a partnership may be, I will face that mystery of being me alone. And then there are the many goodbyes I have to face in life, small and large, and finally that very last goodbye I am going to say to life, a path I will go alone. So in all the loving dances, in all the drama – in the end, I can’t escape being alone.

What is it then, that sustains me? It cannot be a someone out there. Whatever I am ultimately looking for, I can only find inside. But this inside is not this small ego of mine. If I only dare to look deep enough, I will discover how I am inseparably connected with everything. Which sounds a bit like one of those timeless cheesy wisdom lines you find on a teabag label, I know. But it’s true nonetheless, it took me over forty years to find out. Inside myself I will find everything. And then I will see the world around me with a different pair of eyes, I will feel it in my heart of hearts. Then I am no longer alone. This doesn’t mean I will live the life of hermit. But my attitude will be differently, the way I approach a lover, a beloved, and – to use the words of the mystic – the beloved.

Franciscan monk and inspiring mystic Richard Rohr has observed how great love is enormously powerful in breaking up our small ego and opening us up for the great mystery. As is great pain. The heartache of a breakup or a loss, as horrible as it may make you feel, is an invitation to look deeper. Don’t avoid the pain, feel it. Don’t avoid the tormenting questions that haunt you, but be with them. And in all of it, don’t cease to live your life. In time, perspectives may change and who knows what gems are hidden in the dark.Breaking up with a loved one is a painful tragedy. And yet, how many great stories are born from tragedies. When heartbreak is on, it can feel devastating. And there’s no sugarcoating, this is so hard to be with.
But it need not be the end of the story.

Outro:

Hey, thank you for listening. And if heartache is putting you down right now, I hope I could share a bit of encouragement. For all the heartache, I wouldn’t be who I am today without the loves I had in my life. 

My name is Laughing Brook, I am a poet, dancer, mystic, nature coach and man whisperer. 

If you like what you’ve been hearing and would want to support me, please leave a positive rating and a comment on which ever platform you are listing to this podcast. Or send me a comment on my web page laughingbrook.net. It helps others to become aware of it. Share it with friends.  And most of all – please subscribe and  come back for the next episode. 

Thanks for listening, and – keep on flowing, bumping and jumping with the stream of life.